mood: rested
listening to: fiona apple "i know" (great great song)
last read: surgery orders
had a blissfully relaxing weekend. i had to work fri, sat, and sunday. so there were no independence travels for me. i sent the boys, all three of them, off to the inlaws for the weekend. i cried when they left, a little sad to be solo, although it was of my own making. i missed them, but i do feel rejuvenated. i slept in two mornings in a row, watched too much horrible television, ate too many fat-free snacks, cleaned too little. i spent a lot of time with friends, old and new.
today is the first day in 3 weeks that i have not had any flank pain, a mild discomfort still, but not anyone trying to break out of my ribcage. i look forward to my own independence from gallstones. i chalk my reprieve up to the glutenous amounts of sleep i was able to harness.
the boys are coming home this afternoon, and i am promising myself to be okay with their loudness, their rudeness, and their messiness. i know im a good mom. i know they are good boys. and i know my husband loves me even if all the dishes aren't done. i think i need to get that in vinyl lettering and slap it up on a wall somewhere.
on that note, i will continue to listen to great music and straighten up a bit (and watch one last bit of horrible tv).
Monday, July 5, 2010
Sunday, July 4, 2010
there is no title....
mood: relaxed
listening to: humm of the tele
last read: ebay selling page
4 days from my 30th birthday, and it happened-- the grocery store clerk did not card me. baaawaaaahaaaa!!! im officially a ma'am instead of a miss. i know i look older than 21, but aren't they supposed to card anyone who looks 35 or less. i need a tan and some anti wrinkle cream, and fast. i dont tend to be a vain person in general, but the not carding incident piggybacking on the death of my 20s has created a new monster within. because this monster is against my principals, i will have to put it to rest, but i have allowed at least a week to let it rage. sorry if you encounter me.
happy 4th!
listening to: humm of the tele
last read: ebay selling page
4 days from my 30th birthday, and it happened-- the grocery store clerk did not card me. baaawaaaahaaaa!!! im officially a ma'am instead of a miss. i know i look older than 21, but aren't they supposed to card anyone who looks 35 or less. i need a tan and some anti wrinkle cream, and fast. i dont tend to be a vain person in general, but the not carding incident piggybacking on the death of my 20s has created a new monster within. because this monster is against my principals, i will have to put it to rest, but i have allowed at least a week to let it rage. sorry if you encounter me.
happy 4th!
Friday, July 2, 2010
surgery
mood: not so chipper
listening to: washing machine and dryer
last read: jacques torres secret chocolate chip cookie recipe (omg, yum!)
so, after a few weeks of debating and paining, i decided to have my gall bladder removed. it is the "safest" course of treatment, although i feel like a whip and a failure for not gritting my teeth and bearing the pain. i feel like a burden on my family, as it will take three other adults to compensate for my time out. i know in my heart that these feelings are foolish and not shared by anyone involved, but that's how i feel nonetheless.
im weirded out by the thought of some stranger being inside my body. i know im weird. this is just a strange situation for me. but, i am sure i will be totally unweirded out and at peace with it once i no longer have the feeling of someone kicking me in the side. so, i will proceed to just get over it.
on an even less chipper note, a good friend is moving an ocean away--actually two good friends, but one sooner than the other. she is the kind of close friend who does not require a lot of maintenance, and you can pick right back up where you left off no matter how much time has gone by between visits. i love that she is so kind, caring, thoughtful, "northern," has a great heart for the Lord and grounded at the same time. probably most of all, i love that her two little boys are very similar to mine, so i do not need to continually explain away their boyness. she will be missed, but i definitely look forward to visiting her!
listening to: washing machine and dryer
last read: jacques torres secret chocolate chip cookie recipe (omg, yum!)
so, after a few weeks of debating and paining, i decided to have my gall bladder removed. it is the "safest" course of treatment, although i feel like a whip and a failure for not gritting my teeth and bearing the pain. i feel like a burden on my family, as it will take three other adults to compensate for my time out. i know in my heart that these feelings are foolish and not shared by anyone involved, but that's how i feel nonetheless.
im weirded out by the thought of some stranger being inside my body. i know im weird. this is just a strange situation for me. but, i am sure i will be totally unweirded out and at peace with it once i no longer have the feeling of someone kicking me in the side. so, i will proceed to just get over it.
on an even less chipper note, a good friend is moving an ocean away--actually two good friends, but one sooner than the other. she is the kind of close friend who does not require a lot of maintenance, and you can pick right back up where you left off no matter how much time has gone by between visits. i love that she is so kind, caring, thoughtful, "northern," has a great heart for the Lord and grounded at the same time. probably most of all, i love that her two little boys are very similar to mine, so i do not need to continually explain away their boyness. she will be missed, but i definitely look forward to visiting her!
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